We need to talk about red hats and white hoods
Good morning gorgeous, and welcome to the last freezing cold Wednesday of January. Isn't that lovely? Pop a vitamin D baby, we're getting through it together. Today is Bell Let's Talk Day, and while I'm not advocating you switch to yet another awful Canadian telecom, I agree with what they're doing and we should all talk a little bit more about mental health.
So here goes. About three years ago I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety and a panic disorder. If you've never had a panic attack, good for you, honey— you're killing it. For context, it feels like being bear-hugged by an angry Hulk. I really can't recommend it. I had my biggest panic attack at an exotic location, the Hero Burger at King and Bathurst.
I was a master at the facade, you'd never have guessed from my Insta that I was struggling (unless you fancied yourself a dry burg in Nov of 2016). In the last few years, I've worked hard at learning how to befriend my own brain (with a bunch of help from loved ones and real pros), and I've told my story of anxiety, depression, and burnout publicly— 'cause that's the only way to break the stigma, baby.
If you're struggling, I see you. You are not alone.
I have a bit of a mantra that helps with my anxiety. Well, actually, it's not mine, it's Rubeus Hagrid's:
Anxiety likes predictability, planning, and control—but we can't predict the unpredictable— so our brains make shit up to stress about.
Here’s the thing, our anxiety isn’t creative enough to predict the future. Every time we think we know what will happen the universe is like WRENCH and smacks us in the face with something we didn't prepare for.
The universe will toss wrenches into all of our carefully laid plans. The life part is what you do with the wrenches. They can be blunt instruments used to inflict pain, or tools used to build your future.
That is the only choice any of us has: how we choose to meet what comes on this bonkers and beautiful trip.
In the meantime, just keep breathin'.
We need to talk about how red hats are the new white hoods
On Tuesday morning Jussie Smollett, star of HBO’s Empire was attacked by three men in Chicago. The attack was horrific. The attackers yelled racist and homophobic slurs, beat up Jussie, poured an unknown substance on him, and put his neck in a noose. The attackers also yelled "MAGA country" during the attack, because of course they fucking did. Jussie got himself to a hospital and is in good condition. The only term for what happened to Jussie is a hate crime. It was an attempted lynching. We also can’t ignore the homophobia inherent in the attack. The attackers targeted Jussie because he’s black and gay.
There is a bill that will (hopefully) make its way to the house floor soon called the Justice For Victims of Lynching act. The bill will make lynching a federal crime and is the first bill of its kind in a century. Numerous similar bills have failed, because of, you guessed it— racism. This bill passed the Senate in December and now needs to pass the house before going to Trump's desk to be signed into law. American friends, call your Congressperson and tell them to sign it. All friends, take care of each other today.
The Dame Is Back; The Sex Edition
The Dame is a monthly guest series by #wntta's resident Don Draper, an elegant hedonist who suffers no fools.
Congrats, darlings – January is the Monday of the year and you’re almost on the other side. Naturally, this month’s topic is sex. Do I love Valentine’s Day? You bet I fucking do. Red is my colour (when I’m not wearing black), conversation hearts are a seasonal delight, and whether or not its modern iteration is influenced by Big Greeting Card and the Lingerie Lobby, it’s a holiday devoted to love and sex, which are, upon serious reflection, my two favourite things. Baby, my sun, moon and rising signs are all fire – I am a passionate woman who waits for no one. And neither should you, dear readers! So, let’s get off! I mean, let’s begin.
Read the Dame's whole scandalous column on the wntta blog.
Something to make you smash an antique vase
A new bromance is brewing, between Doug Ford and Jordan Peterson. *bangs head into wall*. The two were canoodling in Doug's calendar invites to talk about free speech at college campuses. J-Petes wants The Ontario Human Rights Commission abolished. We should collectively say "Nah".
Something to make you laugh
Iliza is a 7 without makeup. Brian is a 4, with money.
Something to make you think
Let's stop coddling white teenage boys
Something to jam to
The incredibly talented Jussie Smollett as Jamal Lyon in Empire, performing (my fave) No Apologies.
Something to get you through
You get in life what you have the courage to ask for
- Oprah Winfrey
Happy belated birthday, Queen
Thank you for coming by the campfire today. I'm so grateful you decided to join in. Please bring some friends next week. You can grab your own link to share here. I keep writing this little letter because it keeps growing, and that's because of you. Thank you.
P.s #wntta is on Instagram and Twitter, come say hi!